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Assertiveness: How to Stand Up for Yourself and Still Win by Judy Murphy

By Judy Murphy

This ebook exhibits you ways to be a extra convinced, assertive person.

It teaches you the mandatory abilities to be decisive and in charge of your lifestyles.

With the knowledge during this consultant, you are going to discover ways to increase your relationships, flow your occupation ahead, and earn the glory of your folks, family members, wife, co-workers, even your boss.

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Also, when you escalate, remember to escalate only the conversation, not your tone or mood. You want to avoid becoming angry or aggressive. 4. ” This may be the most effective assertive method for dealing with negative situations. First, you identify what the other person has done, and then you explain what the problem is. Finally, you state what it is that you want or need to happen to resolve the situation. For example, “Jim, when you call me fat, it makes me feel unloved. ” The three parts to this method allow you to focus on your needs and the results you want, rather than on negative feelings.

It allows for a balance of expressing your needs while respecting others’ needs. If you really want that vacation with Julie, the best way to get it is to set boundaries about what you want and respect her wants, too. Besides, if Julie’s truly your friend, you’ll want honesty between the two of you. Though it may sound overly simplistic, the Golden Rule of “Do unto others as you would have done to you” is a perfect way to approach assertive communication. From the above quiz and scenario, determine where you stand as it relates to how you perceive yourself.

Fights occur daily on talk shows, and the most obnoxious, aggressive person often gets the most air time on TV. Master manipulation has become a form of high art, sucking the life out of meaningful, respectful interactions. On the contrary, assertiveness carries with it a quiet dignity. It isn’t pushy like aggressive communication. It’s about finding just the right balance of saying “no” to others while saying “yes” to you. Assertive people have the maturity and self-control to know what they want and how to get it without infringing on others’ rights.

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